Make A Choice, Make It Count

I wanted to make it more blurry and it doesn't work quite well. Anyway, I've seen many times that if you do what you like, it will be ok. I am doing it and if I want to stop, after a serie of fall backs, I literally get physical pain. Because I would regret if I'd actually stop ? In this case the heart or the feeling, indicates what to do and it is freaking hard